Starting now I am going to make a conscious effort to dive into myself. I am going to focus in on photography (pun intended), learning what makes me happy, exploring the things I see, and enjoying the freedom I have in my life right now.

Today I started the day slow, made my way down the streets of DC, snapping pictures as I went, realizing that while I may hate how they looked in my camera, I was on a mission to transform them completely.

I sat in Bourbon Coffee for three hours playing around and this is what I’ve created so far…

I can’t believe there’s only one month left of my final summer as a student… Naturally it flew by (as summer always does) and I am in complete denial that I’m about to start my senior year of college. 

Terrifying.

Anyways… In a last ditch effort to get the most out of this last month, I have decided to start my own little shooting project. Most of the photos I’ve made this summer have been for other people, and while I am happy to be getting “real life” experience, summer is usually the time I spend shooting for myself, and I wanted to make sure this summer was no exception. 

Living with someone (specifically a significant other) is a truly unique experience. I feel like I take for granted the time I spend with someone I am so close to. I wanted to capture my experience living here, with Anja - the little candid moments that we share, and the things I notice that no one else gets to see (until now, I suppose). In a way, this is me chronicling my life, through her. So every day, I take out my camera in hopes of capturing at least one special moment With Her.

(I plan on posting these photos day by day, so hopefully by the end of the month this post will include the full collection of photos)

This weekend I traveled north to Washington D.C. to visit my sister (Megan) and her girlfriend (Cassady). I was looking forward to taking some time away from the south, exploring a new city, and spending some long awaited time with my sister. 

After arriving on Thursday, catching up over happy hour drinks and pizza and heading home to pass out, I woke up on Friday for my solo adventure while everyone was at work. I started at District Doughnut where I tried a delicious Fluffernutter donut (featured below, 10/10 would recommend). From there I found my way to the Hirshhorn Gallery and National Gallery of Art to wander around a of a couple new art museums until I needed to rest my feet.

From there, I met up with my sister for a “lunch break” where we made the sweaty trek to Krispy Kreme for 80 cent dozen donuts, and then another sweaty trek back to her office (but not before a quick stop at Le Diplomate for a Bastille Day, Strawberry Blueberry Cream Cheese ice cream cone). After cooling off, I headed to my final museum of the day: the Renwick Gallery, where I waited out an afternoon rainstorm, and then made my way to the final donut stop of the day at Astro Donuts. 

Saturday began with a wonderful pancake breakfast and revolved mostly around laying on the couch. Since my mom’s flight got cancelled, so did our plans for biking around the city and seeing the monuments. However, the change of plans wasn’t too upsetting and having a day to do nothing was a lovely and very relaxing. Around 5:00 we finally decided to get dressed and head to Georgetown for some shopping, tacos, cupcakes, and a walk along the river. 

Sunday was my last day in DC, after sleeping in, we walked to Ted’s Bulletin for brunch (which included a giant cinnamon roll and waaay too much food). From there we walked around the Eastern Market, Megan and Cassady picked up some produce and flowers, and we made a sweaty walk back to their apartment. My flight ended up being delayed for 4 hours, so after waiting around for a while, I made my way back to the airport and finally got back to Charleston around 10:00… 

I have officially passed the one month mark here in Charleston. Internship at Charleston Magazine is going smoothly (but painstakingly slow…), my work will be featured in the August and September editions, so that’s exciting..!
My server job at Another Broken Egg is sttill exhausting and even more frustrating (Working in the food and bev industry has definitely given me a new perspective… never again will I give a waiter or waitress a hard time…)
In the meantime, I’ve had time to explore some of Charleston on my own and I have tasted delicious cupcakes and cookies, wandered the streets, snapping pictures here and there, and trying not to drown in my own sweat.

The other night, while walking around with pals, we came across a colorful wall and decided to have an impromptu photoshoot that reminded me of the “Good Old Days”, romping around my hometown with my friends taking pictures of everyone doing silly things and having fun… It was nice to feel those carefree feelings again

Time is flying by, but at the same time it’s crawling… somehow it seems it’s always passing that way. In a week I’ll fly to D.C. to visit my sister and spend time with my parents, and I think it will be nice to get a change of scenery. My sister and I have been plotting all of the places we plan to eat (including virtually all of the donut shops in D.C.), so whoever may be reading this can look forward to those photos…

Until then…

So I guess sometimes my photos end up saying more about my state of mind than anything else. 

 There is so much light in my life right now. I’m living in Charleston, South Carolina, enjoying sunshine and everything wonderful summer brings (including my birthday ), I’m working at Charleston Magazine where I have started getting scheduled to go out on some shoots (after several boring days in the office) and I’m well on my way to being a published photographer. I have a nice (but exhausting) part time job working at a local breakfast place, and I get to spend at least a few hours every single day with my girlfriend which is really nice after a year of long distance. 

I’ve got a lot going for me to be honest - So why does it feel like the future is looming ahead of me like a dark storm cloud on the horizon? I feel like at the end of this summer I’m going to head into my last year of school and everything is going to take off at a sprint. I need to get a lot of things figured out in a short amount of time and I don’t even know where to begin.
I have no idea where I will be a year from now and that’s scary, but the fact that I don’t even know where I want to be is terrifying.
I feel like life is a game, and if you can see exactly how the game is going to play out, predict every move, and see the final outcome, it’s extremely boring and feels like a waste of time. However, to much spontaneity and uncertainty and you don’t know how to play the game, what moves to make, and what the end goal is. You end up making mistakes because you don’t know what the goal is and in the end, you waste just as much time. 

I know it’s not abnormal to feel lost and confused as a soon-to-be college graduate, but heading into the field that I’m pursuing, you have to have a good bit of confidence and certainty, and I don’t have that right now.
I need to get back behind my camera again. I need to figure out what my goals are and where I want to be…

I’m going to do my best to be more consistent here. I need a place to post my work openly, with or without context, and with as many or as little photos as I want. I hope that this will allow me to continue to share my work with the world and feel like I’m still growing as a photographer… 

We’ll see…